Year End's Reflections.

And what a year it has been.  As I sit here on this blustery eve of the New Year, I have many things to reflect on.  Much has happened, some bad, most good.  I'm not about to go in chronological order here, as I don't have that kind of ability.  Just some random statements and thoughts to get a general idea.

The year, as I remember it (and I'm not know for great recall) came in quietly.  These last 12 months have seen the loss of thirty pounds (I could have done better, but sometimes life gets in the way); we tore out our old kitchen and put in a new one (that is not quite finished, but is still one thousand times better than it's predecessor); our first anniversary passed quietly but happily and we're settling into the routine of married life and home ownership. 

Our summer vacations were spent at weddings and we wish our friends and our family the happiness and contentment that we have found.  New babies have arrived, and new ones are on the way.  Congratulations to all of you.

We lost a beloved family member, who is sorely missed and added 2 kittens to our own family.  

Friendships have warmed and others have cooled.  For this cooling I am sad, but this is how things go.  

And how could I even begin to forget the new chapter in our country's history.  For the first time in 8 years (and my political coming of age, so to speak) I have true hope that our new president will make a difference.  For the first time since I've really cared, I've watched Obama and felt hopeful, excited, and happy that the person I voted for was elected.  It will be a hard year, perhaps a very difficult 4 years.  But if nothing else, it shows the country and the world that maybe we Americans really do have some brains among us.  Please forgive me if I offend, but W didn't do much for me.  Or anyone else as I can see it.

So.  As this new year approaches, so suddenly I can hardly believe it, I am making plans.  Well, more like solidifying plans.  I plan no drastic resolutions, as they always fail.  Instead I want to work toward things already in place.  Basically, getting back on track, with house, with life, with getting healthier and moving forward.  There is much in the way of improvements to be made, but nothing out of reach.  

In this new year I will refocus my efforts on myself and my physical and mental health.  I've learned a rather hard lesson (in my opinion) of drawing lines with friends in the past few months, and I'm taking this lesson to heart.  It's no one person's fault as I see it, but just many small mistakes along the way.  I will work better to be honest and to be a support, but I will not take the burden on as my own.  And the only way to do this is to be firm in the drawing of said lines.  

I will concentrate on eating better and exercising more and more consistently.  

Although I am very happy in our marriage, I think more time can be made for us and we will get back to our nightly dinners and making time to do things together that are not specifically house related.   

I am also learning how to budget and trying to figure out how we have plenty of money on paper but none in the bank.  This is something that can be handled rather easily with a little discipline (something we both are lacking!)

And that, my friends, is what I have to say about that.  The future is bright and the past is quickly fading into fond memories.  

No Bows This Year.

Something you may or may not know about me is that I find joy, and perhaps even take pride in, wrapping presents.  Especially Christmas presents.  I like to find the right paper.  Something at least somewhat elegant and sophisticated (like, not polar bears wrapped in scarves skiing while holding presents and grinning like idiots), and I like to use bows and ribbons to make them look unique.  Or at least nice.  How unique can it really be.  It often involves a theme and purposefully chosen colors (this year it is silver and red).  I even like the gift tags to match although in the interest of saving a few dollars this year, I got the crappy stick on tags.  But whatever.

The point is that tonight I began adding ribbons and bows to the recently wrapped presents under the tree.  I knew that perhaps this would not work so well, what with having young, curious kittens around, but I did it anyway.  And it was short lived.  The damage isn't too severe, yet.  But as I was sitting here watching tv, Spike no so carefully approached a gift.  It had a simple red stick on bow on it.  He bit it lightly.  I looked at him and said, "NO!" in a firm voice.  Cats though, are not like dogs and so he just turned to look at me, as if it was a dare, turned back to the box, grabbed the bow, and plucked it right off the box.  He carried perhaps 6 inches a way and proceeded to dismantle it.

He has abandoned it already, and is participating in some "matrix shit," as Jack likes to say, with his brother.

In the interest of housework, and time, and my box of bows and ribbons I just bought for 9.99, there will be no bows this year.

Thirsty.

Everyone in my house is suffering from extreme thirst. Well, I am anyway. See, it's nearly impossible to sip on a glass of water (or anything else, really) when the cats are around. I have to stand at the kitchen counter and drink it all at once, or I have to travel constantly back to some place the cats can't reach, or I have to trap them in a room (or myself in a room) to enjoy a leisurely drink of water. I say water because this is basically all that I drink. Anytime they see a cup, they stick their heads in, and start drinking. I guess some people might not mind but I'll be damned if I drink out of a glass or cup that has had a cat tongue lapping at it for minutes.

I think that the kittens drink a lot of water because they only eat dry food. It is what "they" say happens. This is fine. I even bought them a small dog bowl for water because even the largest cat bowl wasn't doing it. Still, they are after my water. If I hold it over my head, they will climb my arm. If I move it around, they will follow it wherever I put it. They are not to be distracted. It is ridiculous. They are obsessed.

It started when we first got them--they drank out of a red cup. How cute, we thought. I didn't really think that it would be an obsessive sort of thing with them, but that first cup started it in motion I think. Although even if I had tried to put a stop to it then I don't think it would have done much.

The biggest concern I have regarding this fetish of theirs is that at some point, their heads will get stuck. See below:

Struggling

Ok people. As it turns out, I think I'm Really Sick. Like, flu sick. I'm not having any vomitting issues, but I feel the fever come and go, and I am tiring VERY easily. Sure, I feel great after a nap, but a few hours (if that) later, I can barely hold my head up. This is how I am right now. I woke up this morning feeling better than I have in days. In over a week even. I came to work and I've told everyone how I'm feeling "much better, thank you." I wish now that I could take it all back. My eyes are burning, I feel wobbly and I want to cry and fall asleep. My boss thinks I need to take more time. But I feel stupid coming in and leaving early and staying home and blahblahblah. It's like, make up your mind.

I have things to do though. I can't just leave right now. Ok. I probably could, but pride is preventing me. I'm going to power through the day. Maybe if I eat something I will feel better. We will see after lunch. Maybe if I feel comfortable about it, I will stay home tomorrow, planned, and sleep as long as I can. Because this really is the pits.

I know I had something else to say, but I have no idea what it might have been at this point.

I'm going to feed myself and see if that helps this horribly drained feeling at all.

I'm Here, I Promise (like you even care)

I've taken a brief hiatus from the blog, as you can see, due to temporarily increased workload, and this nagging illness that will NOT go away. I thought I was hitting the end of it, but now I'm not so sure I was. I'm hoping that I am at the end of it now, though. I should probably be home in bed, but I must perservere.

I've been taking care of the baron's pups, and hopefully I'm completely my duties ok. And other than a brief and (from where I stand now, perceived) moment of tension yesterday, the dogs and I are getting along quite well. I'm also a bit sad for this chore to end, but I'm sure their parents will let me visit some.

In other news, Spike's eye is much much better. Which reminds me I need to make a note of when I need to take him back to the vet. Maybe Dec. 27. He got his second (?) distemper shot and his rabies shot on Saturday, too, which wasn't fun for me, him, or the bank account. But at least they aren't constant things. And maybe after one or two more times I'll be able to avoid the vet for a while. I need to take Shelby though, and had I thought about it, or been able, I would have taken him yesterday, but now I'm getting their schedules all disjointed. oh well.

let's see. oh, my friends who were having all their troubles? well, the wife wasn't speaking to me last week, but she seems to be over that now. They were both at my house last night--they were in the neighborhood and Jack needed some studying help, so I walked in the door and man a wall of awkward hit me like no other. I'm not exactly sure where it came from, but I'm pretty sure it orginated from me. First, I was sort of trapped, as I couldn't really be upstairs (the study area) or downstairs, as the husband of the aforementioned wife was enjoying my husband's video games. And you know what else? I had absolutely nothing to say to anyone. Really. I couldn't even figure out one real sentence. So I sort of bounced around the house awkwardly until they left. I think it just goes to show that I really am done.

See, I thought maybe my anger and irritation would wear off, but here it's been a few weeks now, and it's still hanging around. And I thought that maybe when I saw them, I'd conveniently forget about it, and things would be normal. Well. So much for that idea. It's doubtful I can ever really be normal around them again. So much has been said and done, and still, I'm the one who got the short end of the stick. As it turns out, I'm the casualty. I've lost two friends because she, the wife, couldn't keep her mouth shut or if not that, then follow through like a grown up. To be honest, I don't know how she can look me in the eye. Although, come to think of it, I haven't given her the chance. I don't know how she can show her face to me, and act like everything is perfect. I'm not sure I can hide my feelings everytime she says how wonderful he is, or tells him how perfect or beautiful or sweet he is. It makes me gag. It disgusts me.

Right, so you've probably heard this all before, but for me, this is shocking. Because I'm usually a forgive and forget, benefit of the doubt sort of person. At the very least, I was too good at hiding my feelings. It seems that age has changed me. I'm glad of it, too. I'm moving on to bigger and better things, and I'm leaving all the ignorance behind me. If you can't man up and act like an adult, then I don't have time for you. Was that harsh? I don't know. I'm not saying I won't be sympathetic, but there's a point at which my sympathy will turn into disrespect apparently. I'm sorry you got a raw deal, but you need to find the courage and the power to face it and fix it. Don't crap on me. I'm not a sewage treatment plant. I can't just filter the shit and spit out clean water. It stays with me. It hurts me. It damages my faith in humanity. And it makes me question my own judgement. All those times I laughed things off, excused behaviors. I was wrong. Lucky for me, I'm not married to either one of them. I know the responsibility isn't mine, but I still feel some of it.

Whatever. Obviously this is still sort of raw. It's like I sit around with my mouth held open in confused suprise. Like, really? Seriously, you're going to do this to me, and then just leave me here, all alone? You can seriously pretend (do you believe) that everything is fine, back to normal, never really happened? I mean, it's not so bad as being abused by a jerk of a husband, but if you don't care, then why should I?

I'm stunned people. Stunned.

Meh

So.

It's Friday. I feel like crap, and I'm tired. Actually, I woke up feeling pretty good, and energetic, but that has gone now, and I can barely function. If I didn't have important work to do, I'd be going home. Bleh.


Ok. I'm trying to get my brain to function. I'm sure nothing I say here will be of any real interest, but maybe there will be some diamond in the rough.


I feel ok because we have money again, although as soon as it arrives it departs. It's like a visitor you're really excited to have, and then the visitor comes, and you're so excited to spend so much time with that person, but as it turns out, you're "friend" the visitor really just wanted a place to crash for the night. And since my bank account isn't even letting me SEE this friend, well, it's more like this friend no only plans to ditch me in a day, but walked into my house shut the bedroom door and won't come out. And by the time I can get in, she (or he) will be gone. Oh well. I'll take what I can get I guess.


In other friend news, I haven't heard from a particular friend all week. Which is unusual. I emailed her Monday, and nothing. Usually she's pretty good about responding, and I know she's been in her email several times throughout the week. My paranoia says that she's pissed at me because I didn't go and see her Saturday. My more rational side says that doesn't really sound like her, but she can be sort of unpredictable, so who knows. I emailed her again today just to give her the benefit of the doubt, say hi, and we'll see. I won't be emailing her again. Ball is in her court.


Jack got a 95 on his last math test, so yay for that. He's going to pass it, and then he'll be almost done with school!!!


Spike's eye is getting much better, it seems. You can actually see his pupil and stuff instead of just the cloudiness in the left eye, and the right eye looks pretty much normal. We're going to the vet tomorrow for a check up. Here's hoping that we won't have to go back for a little bit.

Really, that's all I've got. I'm going to make some peppermint snowball cookies tonight I think. Jack is out to his office holiday party, so I'm going to rest at home and have a quiet evening that I'm very much looking forward to.

Boo, Tuesday

Can you see a theme here? Boo on this week. It could be worse for sure, but I feel like griping. See, I'm cold. I'm sick. I'm poor. And my kitchen is a wreck because I'm lazy. And I forgot to take meat out of the freezer so there might not be dinner tonight. Although I do have sausage and pancakes if it comes to that.

I got Quicken 2007 for Mac yesterday. I'm trying to use it, but I suck at using it, it seems, so I spent a few hours last night being frustrated by that. I guess I just have to keep working on it and eventually it will make sense. I just need to rig it up the right way, and it should do what I need it to do, which is show us, in pie chart form, where all our money is going, and how irresponsible we really are.

I would really like to go home, and I may in fact do that later, depending on what my workload is like. Stupid being sick.

This morning I had a war with the poor kittens. I let them out briefly so that I could feed them and water them, and eye drop Spike. They were running around like crazy things, but I finally caught both of them and took them to their room, I set them on the bed, and the leaf sucking truck was right outside the window, which scared the living daylights out of them, and off they went. I was tempted to leave them out, but decided against it.

I'm making no sense, so I'm going to go now.

Boo, Monday.

Monday is not my friend. Never has been, doubtful it ever will be. Today I am tired, groggy and freezing my toes off. I had this dream, where I had something really warm AND work appropriate to wear, but I never got to work because my idiot neighbor who is old and REALLY annoying wanted a ride to his job. Apparently, he was senile and couldn't remember where he worked.


When I woke up this morning, I was excited to have something really warm to wear. And then I realized I wasn't quite that lucky. Oh well. But still, I'm freezing. Dad says wear warmer shoes. To that I say, "Then buy me some!"

Anyway, Monday. I'm getting sick, my bank account is empty, and I'm freezing.

AND, I just read an article about a 70 year old worman who just gave birth to a baby, having used IVF, followed by an article about the risks of delaying motherhood. I'm really not a fan of the part where it says that fertility decreases by 30. They say, too, that women put too much faith in IVF. Also, I was talking to my dad, and we were talking about teenaged drivers, and I said he could teach my kids (after all, he teaches 18 year olds how to drive fire trucks), but as it turns out, assuming I had children right now, he'd be well into his seventies. What?? I told him I didn't want to talk about my kids being 16. I haven't quite adjusted to the fact that I'm not 16.

Where does time go? And do I really need to hop on the baby train so soon? Is it really getting to be that time? And how do I convince my husband of this? Wait. How do I convince myself?

Ok. Maybe this is a bit of an over-reaction. I've still got almost two years until I'm 30. But still, all of this talk about advanced maternal age and stuff is rather frightening. And so, what if I wait until I'm 30, and then find out something is wrong, and get set back even more? Bleh. See the kinds of things I obsess over?

Anyway, I hate Mondays.

A Game.

We're gonna try something here.  A little game of sorts.  Maybe it'll be fun, maybe not.  Let's give it a try though.

Grab the book nearest you right now.  Not your favorite book, the coolest book, whatever.  The one that is closest to you as you read this.  

Go to page 56, find the 5th sentence, and post it as a comment.

I'll start.  

"So you'll come over when I'm home, though, right?"

and, GO!

Cookie Success

Last night, I made russian tea cakes (also know, I think, as mexican wedding cookies). They're really simple to make. I'm not the biggest fan of them, but I hear they are good, so that's enough for me. I didn't burn them, although they did get a little brown. The recipe says not to let them brown, but the bottoms, well, they browned a little. They are so covered in powdered sugar that you'd never know, so that'll be our little secret. ha.

Also, I decided to whip up some chocolate chip cookie dough, and try to redeem myself. I only made one tray of them, and will save the dough for tonight maybe. I cooked them at 350 instead of 375, and guess what! They turned out perfectly, just the way I wanted them.

I'm not a failure after all!

The Time to Hesitate is Through.

I'm recomitting people. Really recommitting. I feel it today. Whereas the last few times have sort of been half hearted, with the I'm-doing-this-because-I-should reasoning. I've gotten to where I want to get back on track. And I know I can do it. As I mentioned previously, I cancelled my online membership. Hopefully my hard copy materials will show up soon. Until then, I know what I need to do, and I'm going to do it. I'm also using this site: www.sparkpeople.com, which is helpful with the calorie counting, and free, so I'm headed back there, too.

Good News.

Spike is on the mend it seems. His right eye is almost all better, and his left, well, it's healing. The doctor said it is not holding the stain as much (the ulcerated part, that is) which is good news. She said sometimes these things just take time, and that quite often when she sees this in kittens, it clears up and only occasionally does it recur. So, there is some hope.

We're still on the drops for the left every hour (or as frequently as possible given the fact that both Jack and I work all day), and I'm to bring him back in a week. I may have to stretch this until Saturday next just because I'm not sure I can swing more taking off of work right now, especially if we're making forward progress.

So that's that.

Dreaming of Edward Cullen

"last night was the first night i dreamt of edward cullen "

me: lol

sister: im serious

me: i know

sister: i thought he was in the corner of my bed

sister: i had to turn on the light

My sister has started reading Twilight, and dreaming of Edward Cullen. To her, I say welcome. This is ridiculous really, and slightly embarassing as well. I too dreamed of Edward Cullen. In fact, I'm still dreaming of Edward Cullen, although my dreams have taken a much more sinister turn. I attribute these dreams to the basic inundation of all things Twilight. I read 4 books in 2 weeks, and saw the movie at the end of it all. Of course, since most of my free time, especially in the evenings, was spent reading the books, it's no wonder my sleeping hours are filled with images from the book worked into my life.

Listen, I know, again, that the target for Edward Cullen is your average 12-15 year old. I mean, he's only 17, and a vampire to boot. But we could tack on 10 more years to account for the fact that he's been "alive" for like, 100 years. Edward Cullen is not only beautiful, but he's smart, sweet, caring, and tortured. He's a girls dream come true.

Well.

Aside from the whole craving human blood thing.

That's just a minor detail though, considering all his other attributes. And Stephanie Meyer has done a great job in creating a character that speaks to girls of all ages, I think. And maybe, too, there's something in the purity of Edward's and Bella's love affair that takes us all back to a place that maybe we weren't ready to leave when we did.

It's just hard to get him out of your head. And if you are already dreaming of him, just you wait, sister. Because this is only the beginning. I should know. I've been there.

Santa Claus is Coming to Town.

In the form of a kitten.

See, last night, I was feeling sort of blah, and sort of restless. Jack got new mufflers, so he wanted to put those on. He said he was just wasting time sitting around, and it was a pretty easy job, especially with one of these, which makes working in the dark not so bad. I was vacillating between plopping myself on the sofa and watching the cats tear up my house or going to Target. Target is always tricky because it's rare that I leave the store with less than $100 in miscellaneous purchases, but Jack wanted some long underwear shirts, and we were down to the last roll of toilet paper. (Jack was very concerned about this fact, and dreamed up many scenarios where we might run into a toilet paper emergency if I didn't get some more immediately. I'll spare you the details.) So, basically, I had a good excuse.

I only spent $40. This was really amazing to me. I browsed for hours. Contemplated many items, but put most of them back. The didn't have the shirts Jack wanted, so I figured I had a little extra to spend on crap. I bought a tree skirt for $4.99, toilet paper, hair bands, powdered sugar for cookies to appease the baron, and a santa hat, and an elf costume for the cats. I was pretty sure this wouldn't work, but they were cute, and I was bored.

So, needless to say, it didn't work. I tried, and it was hilarious, but the cats weren't having it, and the things are sorta big for the cats anyway, seeing as how it was one size fits all (meaning adult cats, I'm sure). Mostly, they ate them, clawed at them, hid them. I put the elf collar on Spike and he flipped out. Really flipped out. Literally flipped out.

I managed to wrangle Spike long enough to get the hat on, and have Jack take a quick picture. It was no small feat, of that you can be certain.

Introducing...

Santaspike

Things.

Just a general what's going on with me post.



I cancelled my WW online subscription. I'm not using it, I'm still losing weight, and it's $16 a month I can spend on something else. I bought the books to have as reference, and I'm going to go it alone. I can always rejoin if I need or want to.



The kittens are doing well. I'm pretty sure Spike's left eye will be ruined for good, but you never know. He doesn't seem to be having too much trouble seeing things, and it's certainly not stopping him from clawing me when I try to get him out of the tree.



I've started my Christmas shopping. Mom is done, and Jack is almost done. I still have $18 to spend on him, so if you have any suggestions, please pass them on. I've got several other people to shop for, and it's going to be difficult. The problem is that everyone I know already has everything, especially everything that fits into my budget. But it's the thought that counts, so I'm just going to find some thoughtful things for everyone. Of course, I was going to do some sewing, but that seems rather unlikely at this point. Anyway, I've got several people to buy for, of varying tastes and temperaments. Any suggestions are appreciated.

I was going to try to redeem my cookie skills last night, but Jack said not until some of the already made cookies are gone. "You are making them faster than I can eat them," is what he specifically said. I told him to just eat faster. I might sneak some in tonight! Ha.

Other than that, not much. Vet tomorrow at 5 for Spike.

Cookie Failure.

Luckily, my ability to be a good wife, friend, daughter, employee, etc., is not measured by my baking skills. Saturday, I was messing around the house, and I decided it was time to start the holiday baking. I thought I'd start with standard chocolate chip as these are pretty straight forward, everyone likes them, and they are hard to mess up.

Well.

I messed up. I'm not exactly sure where I went wrong, though I have my theories. The strongest of which is that my dark pan called for a lower temperature. I didn't realize this until I made about 60 cookies in all. Almost all ruined. Flat little things with super crispy edges. Really, I hear they taste just fine, but they look AWFUL. I should have taken a picture but it's too embarrassing, and I didn't feel like expending any more effort on the horrible cookies. I had visions of plump fluffy cookies sitting on a nice platter on my dining room table. Instead, I have 60 cookies shoved into a Ziploc sitting on the counter out of site, but still accessible by Jack (who has no qualms about eating them). I guess if I had half of a brain, before loading up the cookie sheets 4 or 6 times, I would have done some experimenting, but I did not. See, sometimes I get stubborn, and try to force things.

So, after I ruined those, I moved on to snicker doodles. Easy to prepare, pretty straight forward. They turned into flat rocks. I can barely bite into them. Again with the oven temperature, probably. My father says they'd be good in coffee. I'm thinking they'll be good in the trash.

Not all hope is lost though. I made gingerbread cookies yesterday (although the dough was pre-made) and I put them on a lower temperature, and they turned out just lovely. So, I guess there's the possibility that I suck at cookie dough? Or maybe my flour is bad or something? I'm going to try the chocolate chip cookies again, this time with the lower temperature, and see how we fare.

Until then, everyone will be able to enjoy the experience of my burnt cookies and broken teeth!

Twilight, again

I really didn't think I'd fall prey to an obsession like this. I don't really get that into too many things. I get bored easily, and my attention span sucks. That being said, I love the Twilight series. I've finished all 4 books. On Thursday, we saw the movie.

Regarding the movie, I have some issues about it. I'll leave out specifics until everyone who reads this blog, and who wants to read the books has finished with them.

Generally though, the casting was mediocre. Probably because it was a small budget film and actors that are beautiful enough to be vampires have better things to do with their time. Also, the plot changed somewhat. Not enough to really ruin the integrity of the book, but it annoyed me. And then, there's the problem of trying to fit a 500 page novel into a 2 hour movie. There is just too much to squeeze in, and inevitably some of my favorite parts got cut. The special effects were blah bordering on cheesy. Having read a few articles about the making of the movie, the budget was also responsible for this. From what I can tell, there is some bitterness from the director and others involved regarding budget cuts etc. They weren't able to film where they wanted to, and they had to compromise on a lot of things, including effects because of the lack of money.

Hopefully for the next film, the budget will be bigger. There's no way they'll be able to do some of the things they need to do without really making it cheesy.

Christmas Tree Shenanigans

We put our tree up Saturday.  Maybe it's a little early to some, but not to all, and since it's artificial, why not get it up now and enjoy it for as long as possible, right?  We are also experimenting with giving Spike and Shelby free (almost) reign of the house.  They aren't doing too badly, aside from being overstimulated.  Also, they have a fondness for climbing the tree.  At first it was just the bottom half or so, but as the day progresses, they are climbing higher and higher.  See the picture below of Shelby almost to the top.

Human news.

I lost 1 pound today. Not too shabby. That is all, really.

Appointment Update

So, we're upping Spike's medicines, and he goes back on Friday. Which mean's an early escape from the family. Sort of having mixed feelings about that, but it's also Jack's birthday so I'm sure he'll be glad to come home a little earlier.

So, Spike has ulcers in both eyes. The doctor said whatever is going on is probably viral. Which means no real cure. Just treatment and maybe the symptoms will run their course. He might have chronic eye problems. There's no good test for the herpes virus, and the other viral work ups will cost a lot of money and provide nothing more than a potential diagnosis. Because the other cat has already been exposed to whatever it is, and I guess as long as I don't bring any other cats into the house, there's no real point to knowing because again, there's no real treatment other than to monitor and react to the presenting symptoms.

He's still eating, drinking, and playing. He gained 7 ounces in 5 days. But he may have chronic eye problems (can't wait to deal with this for the next 20 years), he may go blind. It seems the biggest concern is perforation, which from what I gather means that the ulcers will eat through his eyes. Lovely.

Oh well. I love them, they're my babies, and I'll do what I have to do. It just sucks, and I feel bad for them, and I want them to be happy and healthy. The pain in the ass related to all these vet appointments, and getting clawed trying to give them various medications, and the cost of the appointments and medications are all secondary, really. I'll do what I need to do, I just wish I didn't have to for their sakes.

It will all be ok, right?

So, Spike is off to the vet, again, for his eyes, again. Even the receptionist at the vet was suprised. See, he was getting better. I was excited, happy, relieved. Maybe it meant we were done with this. We could follow up with the vet, and he'd get a decently clean bill of health, and we could go on our merry way. Well, it turns out our luck is not that great.

Last night when I got home, one of Spike's eyes was swollen. I worried, but thought maybe he just irritated it a little, playing or scratching or something else these wild kittens are doing when I'm not around. I was hopeful that it would clear up quickly (and in fact, it looked better at bedtime last night), but that hope was misplaced. This morning it didn't look better. In fact, it probably looked worse.

So, off to the vet we go. I figure I have few options. If I wait on it, and go away for 2 days, I will be worried and wracked with guilt, especially if it escalates while I'm gone. And I don't want to waste my holiday worrying when it's something I just need to take care of. I'm trying not to be bitter, and really, my bitterness is just a result of being frustrated and worried.

Whatever. We're off to the vet this evening. I never brought the poop sample I was supposed to bring. Maybe I can swing that tonight. I'll probably get scolded. whatev.

It's Birthday Time

I want to give a shout out to my sister on her 26th (!) birthday.

Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Gasoline,
happy birthday to you!

26 will be a good year. Have no worries, and enjoy yourself.

Kitten Concussions

So, Spike is doing much better, which is leading to all kinds of kitten antics in the basement. Shelby was bad enough on his own, but with his brother getting more active again, it's one hazard after another. If I didn't know better, I'd think they were blind. Maybe they are just growing so quickly that they don't realize their own size. They are perhaps awkward and don't do so well with depth perception yet. They are stealthy when it comes to sneaking behind the poster barrier to the other room. They manage to sneak through a space 2 inches wide, and go hide in the Christmas tree. The biggest concern, however, is how durable their little heads are.

After taking their mid evening naps, they awoke with full force around 9:30. They leap through the room from surface to surface. They climb up the chairs, they hide behind the sofa. They find everything they aren't supposed to find. They chase each other and do flips through the air, off the sofa, into the table. They run as fast as their little kitten legs can manage--right into large hard objects. The room is full of the thumping of their feet, and the thuds as they ram their heads into the bar, the table, the sofa frame. In their rush to hide under the furniture, the underestimate their size, or overestimate the space limitations. The worst though, are the hard smacks when they run into something that is, for them, pretty immovable. Last night Shelby dove headfirst into a large speaker. It wasn't just a little tap. It was full force. I mean, he hit it and bounced off of it, sitting there for a moment stunned. It worried me, but didn't seem to affect him much at all. In just an instant he was at it again, plowing through the room.

And poor Spike. He who is just recovering from his ulcers, conjunctivitis, etc.,. We've introduced the squirt bottle, in futile hopes of curbing the desire to turn our (discontinued) sofa into a scratching post. Jack complains, but won't enforce. But I made him last night, and I fear it will be the end of Jack's disciplining of the cats. Spike was scratching at the sofa, and Jack gave him one little squirt, that sent the guy running, stunned in the other direction. Right. Smack. Into. a roll of shrink wrap. We watched as he bounced back, and the roll slammed to the floor. This is not light, fluffy or soft. It is hilarious to watch, but still a bit worrisome to see him sulk off and rubbed at his poor nose. Jack felt pretty bad about that one.

These are the worst two incidents we've witnessed at this point. Maybe they'll figure it out soon. Maybe not. As I was laying in bed reading, I heard Jack trying to calm them down and wrangle them as they were doing flips off the sofa and slamming into the coffee table.

They don't seem any worse for the wear. It doesn't exactly give me hope though. I'm slightly dreading the release from the bathroom into the basement, and from the basement into the rest of the house. I expect that they will have the run of the place by Christmas. I'm pretty sure I'll come home one day to find the tree toppled over, broken glass everywhere, and grinning kittens near by.

I'll be sure to post pictures. :)

FYI, I've had coffee this morning.

So, in talking to Jack last night regarding Christmas presents, we decided to do minimal gift giving to each other, with the idea that if we get some cash for Christmas (which we're hoping for, not because we're greedy, but really, we don't need anything little; not clothes, not crap to set around the house, etc.) we might be able to pool that, and take some from ourselves and get a new TV for the Mantuary. I am very excited about this plan.

This plan has led me to thinking about the set up of our house, our TV habits, and how freaking ugly the TV is in our living room. It's huge and basically unmovable. Chances are it won't survive any attempts at moving it. It came with the house so it's sort of like a bonus, and I don't really care if it implodes and turns into dust. At least then I could sweep it out the front door easily enough. I'm not opposed to TV in the living room. I was raised in a house where there was no tv in the living room, and that was fine. I think it probably helped to create some family bonding time that maybe we wouldn't have had if we had different places to watch it. No tv in our bedrooms, none in the living room. Just my parents' bedroom and the basement. Sure, it was annoying sometimes, and occassionally there were issues over what we would actually watch, but all in all, it was better.

Not to mention the fact that I think the television is sucking my brain out. When I come home and want to relax, when I'm bored, or lonely, I turn on the TV in that living room, and let it turn me into an idiot. In all reality I'd rather read a book than watch tv, but it's like some kind of mind control device beckoning me.

The drawbacks to ditching the TV in there are that sometimes Jack wants to play video games that I don't want to watch. Sometimes he wants to watch a movie, or be left alone. This will, in effect, banish me to the bedroom if there is something on that I really do want to watch. But really, there are so few things I really want to watch. The things I want to watch Jack also wants to watch.

It's a tough call, I think, because if I get rid of the TV in the living room, and there IS something I want to watch that Jack definitely does NOT want to watch, my bargaining power will be lessened. He'd probably concede, but I'd be invading his mantuary, and I don't really want to do that. This is just the tv tricking me. It is unnecessary. We are two people in a house with not THAT many rooms, 4 tvs, 4 cable hook ups, and a cable bill that is 150 bucks a month (ok, that includes phone and internet, but still, up to $100 of that is for the tvs). Stupid. Gluttonous. Not to mention that the tv in the guest room is a total waste, as we never have guests. And they could do without tv regardless.

Ok. I'm talking myself in circles, and I'm pretty sure it's because tv has gotten me all hooked like drugs would. But really, I can watch many shows on the computer. I can prop myself up in the bedroom and watch something if I really want to (and can't access the tv downstairs for whatever reason), and I can spend all that wasted time doing something else like reading, or cleaning, or hey, studying, since that is in my near future.



I'm going to talk it over with Jack and see what his thoughts are. I'm starting to really like this idea.

Relief.

Spike is better, people. Not necessarily out of the woods yet, but he's opening his eyes more, and playing more. I don't feel like I should be rushing him to the vet today. I'm just going to keep watching for some signs of improvement, and take him back to the vet on Saturday for a follow up.

In other cat news, they are getting so BIG. It's hard to see, being with them every day, but they are getting heavier, and whereas I could easily hold them with one hand when we first got them, it's becoming a little trickier to do so. It's kind of sad, how fast they grow, but all kittens turn into cats, so this isn't exactly unexpected.

I've also introduced the spray bottle. I hate doing it, but I want to curb some of the scratching on furniture stuff, and also the chewing on cords stuff. Jack won't be the bad guy and do it. He says to me "They were climbing on the chair, and I know I should have squirted them, but I just didn't, I couldn't." Great. Is this my future? Always being bad cop! Oh well. I also feed them, and they know it.

They have also figured out how to get into the adjoining room downstairs. Granted, we don't have it blocked off well (movie poster about 3 ft tall across the doorway), but it was working. We had them fooled. Until Jack caught Shelby climbing from the tv stand, to the speaker, and over the poster. He moved the speaker, but that didn't fool them. I'm not sure how they're knocking it over, but they are. Oh well. They're going to figure it out sometime. I'm not too worried about what's back there, and kittens can survive much worse, I'm sure.

Here is Shelby, sunning on the bar:

Reading.

This will be a short one, probably. So, you know how it took me three days to read Twilight? Well, Saturday afternoon my sister bought me the second in the series: New Moon. Sunday, I got up and read it some, messed around some, read some more, had some lunch, raked for a few hours (and boy am I feeling it now). It's a hard book to put down.

You might be wondering why I've put a picture up of the third book in the series, Eclipse. Well, guys, that would be because I finished the second book before dinner on Sunday and grabbed the third installment when I went to the grocery store.

I'm almost halfway through.

It may seem that I have no life, seeing as how I'm reading these books in 2 to 3 days. That isn't the case though. First, they aren't that hard to read, and they tell a decent story that sucks you in. Second, when I find something I like to read, I make time to read it. I've watched very little TV over the last week. If it's been on at all, it's mostly background, or Jack, Spike or Shelby is watching whatever is on (by the way, Shelby was mesmerized by Christina Aguilera's AMA performance last night).

Third, even with all of this reading, I did most of my housework (what didn't get done wouldn't have gotten done, book or no book, so that doesn't really count). I went to a long lunch with a friend, I went shopping with my sister, I went out with my friends, I kept the kittens' medicine schedule straight, I raked and leaf-blowed, and hauled piles of leaves to the curb, I went grocery shopping, I cooked dinner, AND I cleaned out the fridge.

So there.

3 Things

I have three things to post. I am going to do them all in separate posts as they all pertain to different, very different, things. Stay tuned!

Sigh.

I finished Twilight last night. I can't remember if I wrote that or not. I'm contemplating picking up the next in the series tonight. Although it might be better to wait until after I accomplish some housework. A friend is coming tomorrow to see the house for the first time. I'm sure she doesn't expect it to be spotless, but we're far from even being close to spotless right now. Luckily Mr. Narls is ok with staying in tonight, so aside from dinner, we'll be staying in. My goals are to start on laundry and clean the kitchen for real. I'll take care of the bathrooms and the living/dining rooms tomorrow morning.

Raking is also on tap. Not thrilled about it, but it's part of home ownership I suppose.

Other than that, I'll be watching Spike closely, overanalyzing, I'm sure. I was hoping for progress last time, and didn't really see any. I'm trying to be hopeful this time around as well. And at least the whole coughing/sneezing/sniffling thing is clearing up.

Right now I'm really tired, and would like nothing more than to go home and sleep until tomorrow morning. I'm sure (and I hope) that will change when I walk out of the building and head home.

It's been a quiet and somewhat lonely week. Those at fault, you know the reasons! =)

Anyway, next week is short, and then 2 days off. And I've already taken care of Mr. Narls' birthday present (by telling him to order this car thing he wants out of our account.) It seems kinda lame--I like to pick out presents and do the suprise thing--but he's pleased about it.

BTW, due to the overwhelming (ha) response to my poll, my husband will from here on out, for the time-being anyway, be known as Mr. Narls, or Mr. N. Got it? Good.

Ulcers.

We've been to the vet and back. Spike has glowing eyes right now, because of the stain the doctor had to use to see if he had ulcers in his eyes. He does.

So.

He gave me some new eye drops. If Spike isn't improving after the weekend, I need to call the vet to examine some other options. The problem, see, is that if it progresses, it could cause blindness, or loss of the eyes all together. We don't want that to happen. His sweet little eyes are so beautiful.

Here we go again. Hopefully this will do the trick.

It's Friday again.

Another week has flown by. It goes so fast that I hardly realize what day it is. I'm not complaining that its Friday already though, just thinking that I need to make better use of my time.


Spike was much better last night, even opening his eyes, running around and playing. This morning, his face looked much better in general, but his eyes were practically glued shut. So, I don't know. I'm stil taking him to the vet to get him checked out.

I'll update when we're finished there. And thanks to mom who is picking him up and meeting me at the vet due to my crazy meeting schedule this morning.

Vet Visit number 3

So, because I'm so worried, Spike is taking another trip to the vet tomorrow. I don't know how to decide if I'm being impatient, paranoid, or prudent. I called the vet's office and they said to bring him in. I really feel like this should be improving by this point. So, off we go again to the vet tomorrow. Hopefully we'll figure something out. I think, maybe, that the problem here is that he is rubbing his eyes raw, and maybe the doctor will have some relief for that. Or maybe I'll just have a damn expensive blind cat.

Twilight: Day 2

I'm 3/4 of the way through this book. I can't put it down. I'm really into it. I am enjoying the story and the vampires. Maybe it's meant for a younger crowd, but I don't care. I want to read all of them! I can't wait to finish this one, and maybe I'll luck out and the sis will buy the next one for me too! *winkwink*

Today.

Down .5 lb today. Not too shabby I guess. Better than nothing, right? I of course with it was more, but considering the fact that I was barely even trying, I'll take what I can get.

Kitten update is that the sneezing and coughing is minimal. I think I mentioned this yesterday, but I tried to pay a lot of attention last night, and while it's still present, the frequency is much less. Shelby is playful as ever, but Spike is pretty sedate right now, except when I try to shove a pill down his throw, or smear goo in his eyes. Speaking of his eyes: he's still not opening them much. I'm beginning to wonder if maybe his eyes are just going to be stuck shut. It also doesn't help that he is scratching his eyes. I think that when I drop the poo off at the vet tomorrow, I will ask them if there's anything I can do? Is there a neck cone in his future? I'm really not trying to be paranoid. This sucks. Also trying to figure out the best way to get individual samples. I guess that I will just separate them tonight? Listen to them cry all night long? This is awful.

Patience is a virtue.

And do not have patience. The last cold I had lasted for over a week. I am a grown woman with a decent immune system. The kittens' illnesses are irritating me. I somehow expect to treat them for one or two days and tada! they're well. I know logically it doesn't work that way, but wouldn't it be nice if it did?

I am seeing some improvement though. The sneezing and coughing is definitely tapering off. And while Spike won't really open his eyes much, they are not so goopy. And it seems like with Shelby, we're heading off the worst of it. I'm getting clawed to shit, right now, and have a puncture wound on my boob. Through the shirt people. I'm smearing neosporin (or the generic CVS version) all over myself just in case, too.

And even if he isn't feeling well, Spike still insists on riding around on my shoulder. I'm trying to wear several layers when I spend time with him. I know I should discourage the clawing, which I will, but it's so hard to punish him when he's sick and clinging to me like a sweet little baby.

Twilight

So, there's been a lot of talk about this book, Twilight, and the series associated with it, and now the movie. I've heard that the phenomenon is akin to the Harry Potter craze. As a side note: I tried to read the first Harry Potter book, but couldn't into it; I've seen one of the movies, I think. Anyway, regarding Twilight, a while ago I went to the bookstore to maybe buy it, see what all the fuss was about, and also, I have a thing for vampires. But it was in the Teen section. I decided against it for some stupid reasons, I guess, like how I was 28 not 16, and besides, I haven't read "teen novels" since I was 12. Maybe that is a snotty attitude. So last night I let go of it, and because I'm lacking things to read, I decided to go for it. How bad could it be. Grown ups are reading it too. It was a #1 New York Times Bestseller or something. It's a fat book too, so I figured that at least it might take up some of my time.

I started reading last night. And I can't quite put it down. I don't know that I would call it spellbinding. But it's a decent read so far. I figure that if it's good enough, the series will keep me occupied for a bit.

The only thing I can't figure out is why the print in "teen" books is bigger and more spaced out than in "adult" books. Do teenagers tend to have bad eyes? Can they only handle so many words per page? I don't get it, but I'm not complaining.

My old lady eyes appreciate the big print.

Anonymity

You may notice that I've added a brief poll over there on the right. Although I only have a few (if that) readers, you never know when readership might go up, and maybe it's important that I don't identify people by name. I don't know. I figure if people want to find me, they can freaking find me, and if people I know find this blog and can identify themselves, well, I try to not post intimate details with identifiable information. And it's not like anything I'm putting out there is a big secret. But, maybe there's something to be said for keeping it more anonymous. Just in case.

So, you people figure it out. Note that you must choose yes or no.

Titles are Stupid (or maybe it's just me).

I am going to mention a few things, and I have nothing evenly remotely clever for a title. So you get what you get.

First, the new medicine regimen is going ok. They took the pills easily enough last night, when I had assistance. This morning, Shelby took it, no problem, because he's a fat ass and likes anything that he can put into his belly. Spike was a slightly different story. It's hard to hold a squirming kitten, open his mouth, and throw a pill down his throat. The first time, he just spit it across the room, but the second time, I just tossed it down there good! I really hope they don't hate me for this. The eye ointment is pleasing me. Don't get me wrong--I have no interest in smearing this stuff on their goopy, gunky, crusty eyes (aside from the fact that it will help them get better). But it seems to already be working! Spike was evening opening his eyes some last night. So, I'm feeling like we've found a solution. I get to smear the eyes 4 times a day, YAY! Trust me, I'm wearing gloves for that. And I feel bad, but due to Spike's apparent love of my face, I'm trying to keep my distance. I've heard that conjunctivitis can pass to other species (i.e. the human species), which means I could be at risk. So, he'll have to just live with that for the time being. It's kinda funny though to watch him figure out different tricks to get to my shoulder.

In other cat news, the rescue group emailed me asking for an update, so I gave them one. Their reply was pretty generic, but whatever.

In people news, I registered for classes last night. I'm not sure I'm 100% accepted, but the woman told me to register for this 0 credit library class, so I did, and I also decided what the hell, and tried to register for my first real class, too. So I did. Go me. I'm looking forward to it, really. Part of me dreads it, only because I know how I am, and I don't want to screw it up. But I also feel ready to do it, so I have that going for me, at least. And I've got some free time in the evenings, for sure, so I should find plenty of time to do what I need to do. That, and I feel somewhat brain dead, so hopefully getting some education will help me out on that front.

In conjunctivitis news, my eyes are slightly itchy, and are watering. I'm sure though, that it's my mascara, right? Or the fluorescent lights? Or allergies? I've been washing my hands good. I really don't want pink eye!

There was a call.

But I didn't get the message until oh, 10 minutes ago.  Stupid cell phone voicemail.  Regardless, I called before I left work, and picked up two prescriptions.  For both Shelby and Spike.  The theory is conjunctivitis.  Gross.  So, I've got a new antibiotic.  Pill form.  Yay (please note the sarcasm).  Not sure how that will go.  And some eye ointment.  I tortured them with that as soon as I got home.  We get to deal with that grossness 4 times a day.  The pill will wait until I have company to help wrangle them.  We still keep on with the eye drops for Spike, but we get to toss the pink stuff.  

I'm looking forward to brighter days and non-gross kitten eyes!

No call yet.

The vet hasn't called. I'm getting anxious in that should I call, should I not call. But word on the street is that he does surgeries during the day, so it's still the day. So maybe he just hasn't had a chance to figure out the chart reading yet. Sigh. I was hoping that they would call, and I would run off to their office, pick up a miracle drug, and I'd have healthy happy kittens by this time tomorrow. As it is, I'm worried he won't call, that I'll have to be a pain in the ass and call, or not call, and just wait. And I'm not looking forward to going home and seeing that poor cat and his crusty eyes. Not only is it gross but it's sad and pathetic.

If they haven't called by the time I leave for the day, I'll call them when I get home. They can kiss my ass if they have a problem with me being pushy.

Identity Crisis?

Spike thinks he's a parrot. When I'm sitting on the sofa watching tv, he like to snuggle up on my shoulder. I figure it's warm there, in the crook of my neck, so ok, it makes sense. And it's sweet, and I imagine as he grows, god-willing, he won't fit there so nicely. But it's become an obsession of his, I think. He HAS to be on that shoulder. Either one will do, but he prefers the left. Last night, because it's always such a fight to get him off, I decided to get up and see if he would get the hint. He didn't. He perched on my shoulder and just sat there as I walked across the room. I was poised to catch him if he should decide to jump (as it seems like quite a leap from my shoulder to the ground for a young kitten), but he never did. He seemed rather content, actually. He wasn't clawing me, making noise or showing any other signs of distress. He just sat there purring. I'm not sure how I feel about this new trait. I mean, again, it's sweet that he wants to go with me wherever I go, riding on my shoulder with a 5 foot view of the world. But it's kind of weird I think. I wonder if he'll start talking?

Aside from that, I'm afraid his illness is getting worse. Yesterday he barely opened his left eye, and now the right one seems to be following suit. He's been on amoxicillin since Thursday, and he's only minorly (if that) better sneezing/coughing/congestion wise. It's all very frustrating. While I'm pretty sure it will all clear up eventually, I hate having to look at his poor pathetic face and have nothing to do for him. I hate that he's miserable, and I hate that he doesn't seem to be getting better. I'm worried about both of them, and while Shelby seems to be going down a similar path, he's not worsening at the rate Spike has. Anyway, I have a call in to the vet, who wants to adjust their meds before I bring them in again. Here's hoping it will do the trick.

TGIF, right?

Yes. I'm very glad it's Friday, although they seem to be coming around so quickly these days. Time is moving at an alarming rate, I'm afraid. Still, I'm feeling pretty good today, and that's definitely a plus. Now I just need to get through the rest of the day and to bedtime without crying. I did last Friday, so let's make this two in a row!

Jack got an 86 on his math test. Go him, and many thanks to our dear Sophia for helping him get there.

What else? I'm jealously staring at the perfect bathrooms at the baron's previous residence. You can take a look here. I'm trying to figure out how I would ever be able to do that. I'm pretty sure that it will be impossible for the time being, maybe even forever with the stupid economy going down the tubes. Jack spent 30 minutes talking to me about GM and how they will be out of money in a few months. No cars means no job for Jack. Ha. I'm not too worried. People need their cars fixed, but his place of employment is still feeling the crunch. No more overtime, and they're sending the techs home. Jack says there has, in fact, been a drop off in business, as people aren't spending the money to fix things that don't REALLY need fixing. Anyway...back to the bathrooms.... I love them. And to be honest, I might totally steal the ideas. I love black and white bathrooms. The upstairs bathroom in my parents' house is black and white. Sure, the lovely blues and greens and greys that show up in expensive glass tile are great. I love them, and if I was rich, I might tile my entire house in those glass tiles. As it is though, I'm not rich, and the black and white is much more classic all around. Not like the ridiculous mint green and pepto pink that exist in my house. Check it out:

You know, some of it might not be that bad. And I'm going to try to work with it because I have no other choice right now. The thing that bugs me the most, that you can't see in these pictures, is that the pink tub in the pink bathroom doesn't match the pink tile in the pink bathroom. The tub is still obviously pink, but more toward the fleshy colored pink. If not for the tub, I could easily update and live with the pink bathroom. I could replace the vanity, the medicine cabinet, and the light fixture, slap on some white paint, and happily go about my life. Anyway...thanks to the baron for making me all discontent with my bathrooms. Also, I'm accepting donations if anyone is interested!

I have go now, so I'll spare you more whining for the moment.

They're going to hate me.

The cats, I'm afraid, are going to hate me with all these doctor visits. On the other hand, at least they won't be dead, right? I took Spike in this morning, and the doctor confirmed an upper respiratory infection. More medicine for Spike: amoxycillin (pink liquid form) and eye drops. So, we're up to 1/2 turn of the supplement he gave me the first time, .7 mL of Albon once a day, and .4 mL of amoxycillin twice a day, plus the eye drops once a day.

I'm concerned, as any good mother should be, but I'm not really worried. They are both still eating, and drinking. They are both sleeping and playing. Their behavior isn't changed and they aren't lethargic or acting weird. Of course they're young so I don't want to let things get out of hand, but we're going to be ok. My bank account, on the other hand, may not be.

It's really pathetic taking them to the doctor, and more precisely, separating them. They cry and cry and cry. Spike cried all the way to the vet, and the entire time we were waiting. And when I went home I heard Shelby crying right away.

At least they have each other when they realize I'm an evil lady who takes them places to get thermometers shoved up their butts, and syringes shoved down their throats. And lets not forget those horrid eye drops . "Just grab the skin on their necks like their mother would do..." except she wouldn't drop anything into their eyes!

Oh! There is something to say!

Down 1 lb today! And I'm bloated, so maybe there is another lb to be lost hiding in there.

What is there to say?

Spike is sick, so off to the vet we go in a couple of hours. Hopefully it's easily treatable. I'm worried, but trying not to be. Afterall, he is eating, drinking, and playing still.

My world is still crumbling though the initial shock and disgust has worn off. Not that I'm over it, but the urgency and the upset has died down. For now, anyway.

Turf Wars

The kittens have apparently decided that my face is important territory. I was trying to relax while I was home sick yesterday, and this is what happened for most of the morning (and excuse my picture taking face--it's about the kittens!):

We've got Parasites, People.

The kitties are sick. Just got a call back from the vet. Their poop has parasites. Coccidia (I thought she said toxidia, but say them out loud. On the phone they sound similar, especially if you don't know much about it). Anyway. Treatable, it seems, with a medication called Albon (assuming I heard that correctly). So I go to pick that up tonight.

The Weekend

So, the weekend is over, much to my dismay. I'd like for every day to be the weekend, and I'm sure I'm not alone there.

The vet appointment went well. I'm waiting to hear back on the poo test results. The doctor didn't seem overly concerned with the sneezing. He said to keep an eye on them, so I am. We've got some kitty sniffles, but they're still eating, drinking and playing, so I'm not too worried at this point. Too young for theirs shots, so we're going back in a week or two. Dr. Carman is lovely. He's very easy to talk to, and that's a plus for me.

In other news, on Saturday, Jack and I were standing at our window in the dining room that overlooks the back yard. The wind was blowing and leaves were falling. Jack exclaimed loudly about the back yard, and all of the leaves we need to now rake. He did not see this (until I pointed it out):

Can you see the deer? Forgive the crappy picture, but deer aren't really fond of posing for pictures, and at 9:30 in the morning all I had available was a cell phone camera. Jack got some shots with the good camera that I might be able to access tonight. Regardless, the deer was just chilling there in our back yard, mid morning. And then our neighbor inadvertantly scared her away.

Friday!

TGIF for reals. I'm just hanging out waiting for 10:30. So I can go to my meeting. And then...I can LEAVE! It's an early day for me folks, and a nice early start to my weekend. The only drawback is the collecting of poop I have to do, and the fact that the vet appointment is at 5pm. I was hoping for something earlier, but whatever.

Speaking of the vet, I had a dream about it last night. Several things happened. First, I went to see Dr. Carmen, who is purported by several family members to be amazing. In that he's sweet AND hot. I have not been to the vet in a long time, and so, cannot imagine his face. But in my dream, hot he was not. Not necessarily bad looking, but he didn't live up to my expectations. Also in my dream, there were two doors to the room we were in, and the office staff and doctor kept leaving them open and my kittens kept escaping! I also had the boys' mother with me, but she didn't show up until later. And the weirdest part was that our appointment finished earlier and the doctor disappeared, and I needed to ask him something. When I finally found him, he was laid out on two tables, covered in white sheets--TAKING A NAP. Now why in the hell would I have a dream like this? It was actually pretty funny in the dream, but it's probably not translating well here.

Regardless, I'm a little nervous about the vet. But only due to my usual stuff. Wanting to do the right thing, say the right thing, blahblahblah. I keep telling myself that I'm not the biggest idiot that's ever walked in there, so it will be fine. I just can't forget the poop.

I like to make lists (not that I ever follow them)

Well, the bad news of the day is that the scale didn't move. Or, more accurately, it didn't move DOWN. It went up by .5. I'm really not pleased with this current trend, and I am mad at myself because I know I have not been doing my very best. Still, I did better this week. And next week I will do even better. Jack has promised to take walks with me, so that will be something at least. So, this week's weight-loss related goals are as follows:

1. Walk at least 3 nights.
2. Make better choices when eating out.
3. Track EVERYTHING.
4. Drink lots of water.
5. Measure, Measure, Measure.

I'm taking off early tomorrow after my 10:30 meeting (which is hopefully rather short). I have to have the kittens to the vet by about 4:30, so I will have some time to do a few things. These are as follows:

1. Clean the kitchen.
2. Have a sensible lunch.
3. Change the bed sheets.
4. Clean the pink bathroom.
5. Collect cat poop.
6. Wrangle the cats into their carrier(s).

Maybe if I actually made physical lists and put them around my house, I'd actually get things done. But, probably, I would just have to have a list about making lists, hanging those lists, checking off those lists, and throwing away the lists that I put up and then ignored.

Just some things.

Life is not so crazy right now in our household, aside from the rambunctious kittens taking up our time. My house is going to hell thanks to my preoccupation with those little guys. Can you blame me for ignoring house work to play with them?

I didn't think so.

We have a vet appointment for Friday evening. I think everyone is ok, but they need to get checked period, and Spike was sneezing last night. Shelby is limping a little bit, probably caused by their rowdy playing. It isn't bothering him too much. He's still running around and playing and acting pretty normal. Regardless, we'll get some peace of mind seeing the vet. I have to take some of their poo with me. Gross.

I'm so nervous and paranoid about them, but I'm also keeping my perspective. We've never really owned pets before. Sure I've always had cats and dogs, even birds, throughout my life. But they've never really been MINE. They've never been my real responsibility. It's a little stressful being the responsible one. I guess I ought to get used to it. Until then, I guess I'll just worry constantly. But I think these guys are in good health and are pretty tough, so until I hear otherwise, I'm just gonna cool it.

Other than that, no major projects going on. I think that we will try in the next couple of weeks to make some progress on our yard. We need to rake, and maybe we can rip out some of the stuff that I hate that resides in our front yard. The flower beds in the front are horrendous. I'd like to just take everything out and start over with some evergreen stuff that we don't have to worry about. But then what would I do with the stuff that is already there? I'm not really known for my green thumb, although I'm proud to report that I still have 2 living plants that I got from Ikea, and a third from work--drowned by coworkers during a lengthy absence of mine--that is coming back to life. It looks pathetic, and is just a shadow of it's former self, but I think it will recover with time.

One the eating front, I'm making some progress, but not as much as I would like. I'm hoping to have a scale victory tomorrow, but I'm not counting on it. I am, however, having little non-scale victories every day. The most important of which is curbing the snacking in the evenings (both before and after dinner). I'm controlling my snacks, or ignoring them all together. This is a very good thing.

Other than that, I got nothing. Looking forward to the weekend. It's filled with many events, but they are slowly weeding themselves out to the point I might have a happy, manageable weekend with enough time to spare to do some yard work and get my house back into the shape it deserves.

It's a Good Day

It's a good day. We have elected a new President. Yesterday afternoon was tense. I was remembering my last two presidential voting experiences, and how disappointed I was in the outcomes. Last night, I was anxious to get home and turn on the news although it really provided little relief. And honestly, I don't like listening to all the commentators. I don't like hearing their speculation, their drama, their whatever. They're trying to get ratings. I get that it's the business they're in, but it doesn't nothing but cause me anxiety. So we turned it off for a while, played video games and watched the kittens bounce around. When we turned it back on, as we were watching, they started calling more states, bigger states. States that meant McCain probably didn't have a chance. But I was still skeptical. What if they're wrong? How can they call a state when there's only 9% of precincts reporting? I guess statistically they can assume. But people have been wrong before.

And then I looked at the tv, and it said, on the bottom, "Breaking News. Barack Obama elected." Or some variation thereof. I honestly didn't believe it. I kept thinking, aren't they making assumptions pretty quickly? The polls on the west coast had just closed minutes earlier. I was afraid to believe it. And even after I watched his speech (or the beginnings of it, anyway), I wasn't going to get my hopes up until I woke up this morning, and saw that it had lasted, that it was true, without a doubt.

And so it is. I am excited about this new chapter, and anxious for him to get into office. I am not so naive as to think he will snap his fingers and all of our problems will be solved. But I am hopeful enough to believe that he will make a difference. That he will inspire a nation, and even the world. That he will restore confidence in the American people, and in the global community in which we all live.

Hope is a wonderful thing.

All I can do now is wait

I've voted. The line wasn't so bad. It took me, from start to finish, about 45 minutes. I think the only thing that kept it from being shorter is the bus of about 15 elderly people who got to go to the front of the line.

A few things about the voting process. The first is how easy it is to get that little voter card in your hand. They didn't check my ID or my voter registration card. I just had to tell them my name, my address, and my birth date. Not too hard to find that information. But, I guess, what would be someone's motivation really for impersonating me in order to vote? Most people are after more tangible gain than one vote. And how would they know if I had voted yet that day? It would probably get sorted out, so I'm not too worried. The second is how quick it really is, assuming, I guess, that you can read, and you've thought about the ballot ahead of time. The third is how I fear those people standing the proper distance from the polling place and harassing you.

"Have a Sample Ballot"
"No, thanks."
"But it's the ballot you'll be voting on, you should really look at it."
"I already have."

Seriously? Shut up and leave me alone.

"MAKE SURE TO VOTE OBAMA/BIDEN AND FOR STENY HOYER"

Dude, I can read your big OBAMA sign. I know you're trying to help. But if we say no once, just take it. And don't yell things at me like I'm some kind of idiot.

Ugh. It annoys me. Of course I would like everyone to vote for my preferred candidates, but I think it's a personal decisions. And I think it's safe to assume that if people have come out to vote and don't run in the other direction when they see a long line in the middle of a cloudy, rainy November day, the odds are they already know who/what they're going to vote for. It bothers me, these people standing there and badgering me (ok, maybe they aren't that bad, and I get the point and all, but I don't like having to say no 17 times OR be rude and ignore them.)

It reminds me of all those seemingly friendly people in Charleston on our honeymoon that wanted to offer us friendly tourism information. Except all they really wanted to do was trick us into listening to them for 20 minutes in an attempt to convince us that that free dinner was worth a 4 hours jaunt through town to look at time shares and make us listen to seminars on the value of one of said time shares. Dude, we're 26, we don't have any money, and I highly doubt we're your target audience. They probably get some sort of commission for every person they lure in.

Anyway, back to my original train of thought--I've voted. It was simple, and I can't stand they wait. When do they start that exit pole business? I want some numbers NOW!

At least I don't write like a total idiot.

Assuming this means anything, anyway:

A Day of Hope.

Today, I am hopeful. Today, I hope that I am a part of making history. Today, I hope that we, as Americans, will make the right choice. Today, I hope that instead of feeling angry and disillusioned, I will be excited about a new chapter in our political history.

To me, this isn't just another election. I think many people feel the same way. Voting is something that I think many people take for granted. It's something handed to us, and regardless of what they teach us in government class in high school, we (or at least my generation) don't really understand what a privilege it is. But I am not going to lecture, because I've been there. But today, voting in this election, as an adult (measured by practical standards, not by age), I am excited to vote for the person (Obama! duh) who represents things that mean something to me, that affect me, that will ensure for me a better future, as well as one for my children.

Of course we have no way of knowing what will REALLY happen. I doubt that all of those people who voted for Bush 8 years ago could foresee this mess. But I trust that if nothing else, Obama will give us a fresh start, will be a beacon of hope for America and for the world. Maybe he doesn't have a lot of "experience" but maybe that isn't a horrible thing. Maybe it's a refreshing thing. Experience doesn't mean you make good decisions. And it doesn't mean you're smart. And it doesn't mean you have the best interests of everyone at heart.

So. I'm anxiously awaiting lunch time, so that I can cast my vote. Judging by the absence of many people at work, I'm guessing the lines are long, and this pleases me. Sure, it's a pain in the ass to wait in line forever with nothing to do, but it means people care. And that, perhaps, is the most important thing.

In my house, we cannot merely say "vote." Every time I say that I'm going to vote, or ask Jack about voting, he looks at me sideways and says, "You mean you're going to Barack the Vote."

So people, let's Barack the Vote!

I've got a name, people

And, it's Spike. Shelby (which, by the way, started off as a male name until people made it into a female name, so no more on the "isn't that a girl's name?" business), as far as I know will stay Shelby.

So, we've got Spike, I think it fits him well, and Shelby named after this guy.

In other news, not directly related to kittens

It's a new week, and I've got my menu planned. The kittens are giving me extra incentive to go home at lunch time, and I shopped accordingly. Looks like a week of lean cuisines and being not quite satisfied is ahead of me. That's ok, though. It needs to be done. I've got a 40lb goal to meet by my 1 year anniversary. When I made that goal, 2 months ago, it was more than attainable. Now, though, I've set myself up for a more difficult go of it. 7 months isn't horrible, but it makes the time line a little tighter. I mean, that's almost 6lbs a month, almost 1.5 a week. It's doable, but it's going to take effort and will power, both of which I've been lacking lately. Last week wasn't horrible on the food front, this weekend wasn't great, but it was better than it has been. So, here's hoping I can get my act together, and see that scale move this week. My plan also includes nightly walks with Jack. Ha! Guess I should fill him in on that.

I've stocked up on low point snacks (turkey pepperoni and pickles for after work; frozen berries and cool whip for dessert). Yesterday I didn't have any inclination whatsoever to grab a piece of left over candy (of which we have plenty as our neighborhood is apparently not conducive to trick or treators--we had some, but not many). I'm feeling good about my plans. I've got meals done through Thursday, and I'm considering not buying any groceries next week (aside from lunch things) as I've got enough hot dogs and hamburgers to feed a small army. I'm thinking we might do that. I'm also wondering if there would be anything wrong with cooking a hamburger patty and repurposing the meat--as if it were just regular old ground beef.

I'll have to look into that, and stock up on recipes with hamburger meat.

We Survived

Well, we survived our first day and night with our kittens. I checked on them this morning and they were still alive, still alert. They had eaten, they were playing, and everything looks well so far.

They've discovered that there is a whole new world to explore outside of their little bathroom. Once we got them home, they seemed thrilled in that bathroom. I'm sure they now have more space to move around than they'd ever had before for any length of time. Now that they have settled in and gotten comfortable though, they're just waiting to bolt through that door. We've had a few escapes, but they aren't that hard to catch if you are careful. And it's not that we don't want them to explore, but I think it's better they stay contained, and close to their litter box for now.

They play more than they cuddle, but if you tire them out enough (which seems hard to do) they are very sweet.

I might be talking about them a lot in the coming days, so you'll have to bear with me.

Introducing...???

Names are still up in the air. Any suggestions will be appreciated. I have the job of naming that one there on the left. The one on the right, Jack has tentatively named him Shelby, but that is apparently not definite yet. So, any wonderful boy names you have to share? I'm really drawing a blank.


The story of these boys is simple really. We saw them at different times at Petsmart, and we went to get them today. Process was simple, we spent a butt load of money on stuff we need and don't need, and brought them home. They are wild, rambunctious, adorable and sweet. It was sort of sudden, quick, whatever, but it felt right.


We're in love.

Paranoia and Petsmart.

So, the first thing that I want to talk about, is that just because I seem emotional right now, just because I don't feel well, just because I'm drinking water at a Halloween get-together, just because I'm not smoking, none of these things mean I'm pregnant.  (for the record, I'm worried about the grammar in that sentence, but you get my point, so whatever.)  BUT.  Everytime someone says it, it makes me a little more paranoid, so I start counting days, and overanalyzing every little feeling I have.  The odds are like, maybe .01%.  So please, for my sanity, and the sanity of all women around us, don't say the p word unless you know someone is trying.  Yes I'm 28.  Yes I'm married.  Yes I want children.  Someday.  All of my symptoms can be contributed to other legitimate causes.  AND, I've gone this long without getting pregnant so I guess I'm doing something right.  Or I'm horribly infertile.

Enough of that.

I went to Petsmart today.  I was going to get a few cat related things to be prepared should some kittens fall in our lap in the very near future.  My dad ended up pissing me off, and then I got confused so I didn't get anything, but I did come across 2 adorable kittens.  Jack and I are going back tomorrow morning to see about adopting them.  I'm trying not to get too excited until I have them in my hands and in our house.  I will update as I know more.  Right now, I want night to come so I can go to sleep and wake up and find out if it's a possibility or not.  Jack says to me "you aren't a five year old, you can handle this."  

But today, I'm definitely a 5 year old.  

Who needs to go drano her shower.

And do some cleaning and some other house work.

Just in case her attention needs to be placed elsewhere tomorrow.

I'm not going to lie

I'm afraid of trick-or-treaters. I find little kids coming up to the door begging for candy to be rather intimidating. I've been trying to ignore it, trying to get excited about it, but part of me wants to hide out in my dark house and hope no one comes knocking.

Ha.

Things that please me.

Last night I went to this restaurant, owned by the singer in my dad's band. I'm trying to remain slightly anonymous so no creepy internet weirdos start stalking me. Not that it would be that hard to find me anyway, but whatever. My dad has had some interaction with this program, and these kids were performing last night. It was very pleasing to me. These kids are learning instruments, singing, and performing, and having a good time while doing so. I think it's a great thing to encourage, and I think students don't get enough of it in school. It gives them something to do, to work toward, to be proud of. And as my mother *keeps* saying, "not every kid is an athlete."

It also pleases me to see my dad doing something he loves (music) and combining it with his desire to serve the community (which is evidenced, in part, by his committment to volunteer firefighting for most of his life). He is happy, he's using his experience to bring some additional fun to the program, and it's just an all around pleasing thing to see.

The one thing that did not please me is the lack of meaning my life has. Perhaps that's strong, as I do feel that I provide something valuable to my friends, and my family, and my job. But I'm not doing something that really makes me feel GOOD about my contribution to the world. I keep telling myself that this current place I'm in is a means to an end, and I think this is the truth. I will get my new degree, and perhaps that will lead me in the direction I'm really meant to go.

One more thing that does please me is this:

This is Satchel Paige, named, apparently, after this guy. It was his foster name, so I'm not sure why or where it came from, but that is beside the point. My sister has taken over the care of this dog, for reasons I don't feel like discussing right now. Satchel, while really a sweet dog, has some big behavior problems. She is working with him though, and he is getting better and better. They have bonded, and that pleases me as well. I think my sister has a lot of love to give, even if she doesn't always show it, and if anyone is in need of love right now, it's Satchel. Thanks to a collar recommendation from the baron, long walks have become less painful and more pleasurable. AND, thanks to a little daring on my sister's part, and a lack of pedestrian traffic yesterday, she let him off, OFF! the leash. AND he explored, AND when she called for him, he came right back to her. It even afforded her this photo op. This is real progress people. And it pleases me.

Maybe...

I'm posting frequently, I know. Maybe this will make up for that time in the future when I'll totally forget what a blog even is. I want to get the camera, and do a DITL, which has nothing to do with this. Rather, it is a Day in the Life photo collection. Maybe I could try to do one weekly. These photos may not be very interesting, but perhaps they will point out, to myself, that I need to make better use of my time. If nothing else, maybe it will get me using the camera we bought and rarely use. Maybe it will force me back to that photography world I dabbled in briefly and then abandoned for no good reason.

Maybe, maybe, maybe.

I'm sick of Joe the Plumber

The baron points to a brief, but helpful, article in her post today. I watched Obama's commercial while I finagled my new curtains into their positions. To be honest, I only half paid attention to it. I know where my heart is, where my head is, and who I'm going to vote for on November 4. There is nothing that will change my mind at this point. Still, I like watching Obama. He makes me excited. He makes me hopeful. I'm not going to lie. I'm cynical when it comes to politics. I know Obama isn't perfect. But I'm hopeful that someone younger, someone newer, someone less "experienced" might be a refreshing change. I feel real hope. Maybe that's naive, but here's hoping, right?

Productive

This evening I'm feeling rather productive and wanted to write about it.  Sophie came to help Jack with math.  This after his mother took us all to dinner at Hard Times.  Really not helping me with my eating (or more specifially NOT eating) plans.  But oh well.  Free dinner I didn't have to cook, with people I don't mind spending time with.  I've hung my new curtains, bought because they are supposed to help insulate.  I'm not thrilled with the color or material really, but as I'm sitting here I'm already noticing that it is a little warmer than before.  Function is the key here.  And maybe once the wrinkles fall out (me, iron?  i don't think so) and I get used to them, maybe they won't be so bad.

I also went through a few piles of crap from the office, and shut up the guest room for the winter.  I made a bigger mess out of my living room, but did remove some of the said crap from the office to the downstairs pile of crap for later reorganization.  I also made a deposit to the box of lies (aka the bin with random wires, cords, etc.) so named because once, after purchasing miles of speaker wire for some household project, Jack happened upon this box and realized it was hiding all sorts of speaker wire and I had never told him about it.

I also watched Dr. Rey argue with his bitchy wife while she tried to boss him around.  I killed a few brain cells, for sure.  

One other thing.  We announced at dinner that we are adding kittens to our family.  My mother in law seems very keen on this idea, and has just this evening sent me 7 craigslist postings for kittens needing homes!  I think she is living vicariously through us.